You've Got Mail -- Introduction

Everybody loves to get letters, especially personal correspondence. There is nothing like finding an envelope in your mailbox from a friend or relative you haven’t heard from in a while. All the bills and junk mail are quickly put to the side and you rip open that one particular envelope that has your address handwritten and a return address you recognize.

Finding a treasure like that in your mailbox is sure to put a smile on your face because it means someone has been thinking about you. The writer cares enough to take the time to sit down and put pen to paper to let you know what is new, and ask you how you are. Even a simple note of encouragement is worth its weight in gold!

And now there is email.

Do you remember when receiving an email gave us the same thrill we got when receiving a “real” letter? We read through each one from start to finish, and clicked on the reply button to send our personal thoughts in response to the sender, or our sincere thanks – after all, someone was thinking of us!

Then we got more, and more, and more “forwards.” They got to be increasingly ridiculous! Many were those you-must-forward-this-to-at-least-10-people-by-the-stroke-of-midnight-or-your-spouse-will-turn-into-a-cat, or if-you-forward-this-to-4-people-you-will-find-true-love-within-three-days emails. Soon we began deleting them without a second thought.

You’ve Got Mail came out at a time when the phenomenon of email, chat rooms, and the concept of internet dating was still new and fresh. The soaring popularity of all things technical fuelled the fire of this romantic comedy. It was a guaranteed hit with Tom Hanks headlining as Joe Fox and Meg Ryan portraying Kathleen Kelly. These two stars, along with director Nora Ephron, were together again after their previous smash success, Sleepless in Seattle.

Supposedly, the opposite of love is not hate but indifference. The chemistry heats up between Kathleen Kelly and Joe Fox as they are anything but indifferent towards each other. In the beginning, they have two simultaneous yet separate relationships.

Warning: There will always be a Philip Stuckey

Near the end of the movie, Edward’s lawyer, played by Jason Alexander, shows up at the hotel where Vivian has been staying with Edward. Edward’s stay in town is coming to an end and Edward is not in the suite at the time. Philip has been informed about exactly how Edward met Vivian, and he has been eager for Edward to leave town so he can make a move on Vivian for himself. He is not the gentleman that Edward is. He makes no attempt to be kind.

"This isn’t home.
It’s a hotel,
and you’re not the little woman.
You’re a $50 whore."

Phillip Stucky provides us with an accurate picture of what Satan is like:
• He will be at the door of your mind when you least expect him.
• He will make accusations – some of them you may be tempted to believe.

Satan will always remind you of your worst moments, your past your failures, and your self-doubts. Unfortunately, he knows your weaknesses too and will exploit them whenever possible.
• He will overpower you if you let him.
• He seeks to steal, kill and destroy any hope or joy you have found. Satan will curse you, accuse you, and lie to you. He will try to tempt you, he will threaten you, and he will try to defeat you.

Your Phillip Stucky could be Satan himself, showing up as negative thoughts in your head: doubts, fears, anxiety, regrets, shame and other self-defeating emotions.

But thank God, Jesus is always right there when you need Him:

“Call on me in the day of trouble;

I will deliver you, and you will honor me.”

Psalm 50:15

Once you are a new creation in Christ, you have the authority to order Satan to leave you alone. Whether it is an echo of an abusive voice from your past or an addiction that has you in its grip – you have the power, in Christ, to overcome it. If you feel you need help in this area, I recommend Neil T. Anderson’s Freedom in Christ Ministries.

If your Phillip Stucky is a real, flesh and blood, person who is verbally, sexually, physically, or emotionally abusive then you need to get help. Right now. Call a women’s shelter and get yourself free. No one should ever have to live like that. Call a Christian Counsellor – if you don’t know one, call your local church, and keep on calling until you get the help you need.

“It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”

Galatians 5:1

Jesus wants you to be free to become the woman He created you to be. Do not cave in to your Philip Stuckey.

Readers: Where do you most want freedom in your life? Have you asked God for that? Why not do it today?

The Power to Transform

As I have mentioned, Vivian doesn’t have much success shopping by herself. Remember the uppity ladies in the store on Rodeo Drive? Edward has to escort her into a store and basically purchase her respect by spending what he describes as “an obscene” amount of money.

At this point, Vivian begins to look as though she is a respectable woman, and Edward’s money ensures she is treated as one. But neither of these would likely bring about an intrinsic change for Vivian. For that to happen, she has to see herself differently. By the final scene, she does.

Vivian has learned what it feels like to be valued, to be significant, and to be respected. Edward not only ensured that she looked different and was treated differently, but also he expanded her worldview by exposing her to new experiences like a polo match, a flight on his private jet, and an opera. Because she had the opportunity to see the world differently, she also began to see herself taking on a different role in society.

She begins to think how different life could be, and should be, from the life she had been living. She begins to see her inner-value as a whole person, rather her market-value as a ‘service-provider.’ Finding a high-paying customer is no longer her idea of success, now she will settle for nothing less than a life-mate who will see her as his equal.

Therefore, she begins to behave differently. She becomes more of the woman she was always intended to be. She is so changed by the end of their week together, that when Edward offers her an apartment and a car to be available for him whenever he is in town, she is offended by the offer. Just one week ago, she would have thought herself lucky to get a ‘great deal’ like that. But now she no longer sees herself as a cheap street hooker, or even an expensive “beck and call girl”.

Instead, she sees herself as a potential bride. She realizes she is someone who is capable of giving love and deserving of receiving love. Vivian tells Edward that she is no longer willing to settle for less than “the fairy tale”. There is no way she can go back to her former life. Her transformation is complete.

This is like what happens to us when we spend time with Jesus. We become the woman we were always intended to be.

“And we …are being transformed into his likeness

with ever-increasing glory.”

2 Corinthians 3:18

It is a mystery how it happens, exactly. I can’t really explain what happens on the inside of you, what happened on the inside of me. What I can say is that day by day, as I spent time in His Word, choosing to believe it and receive it, I changed. I became sure of who I was. I began to see myself as Jesus saw me. I let His forgiveness of me become real. I chose to believe that I am who He says I am, and that He loves me.

This is how Jesus gives you an Extreme Makeover from the inside out.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation;

the old has gone, the new has come!”

2 Corinthians 5:17

The more you read the Word and believe it, the more real and powerful it becomes in your life. Reading this book and learning the Surprising Truth can be just the beginning. If you persist in learning about Jesus and His incomparable love for you by reading the Bible for yourself, you too can and will be;

“transformed by the renewing of your mind”

Romans 12:2

Jesus has the power, the resources, and the will to transform you completely. He wants you to see yourself for how valuable you really are. Remember the price that was paid for you? Jesus longs to see you feeling so good about who you are, and how highly you are prized, that you are absolutely glowing.

You will look, and feel, like the Pretty Woman you are.

Precious Sister: Are you being transformed? Or are you still waiting for the process to begin?

A Special Note of Thanks to Beth Moore

I am really quite an avid reader and there are plenty of authors I will list on this site at some point to give you an idea of the writers who have influenced me. But there is one who deserves special mention because she, more than all the others combined, has had the largest influence on my life and walk with Christ.

I will say right away that it is not because of Beth Moore per se, it is because she turns me to the Word. She turns me toward Christ, and so it is really Jesus who is the greatest influence on me, but He has used Beth to accomplish it, and for that I believe she deserves some thanks.

The first Beth Moore Bible study I ever took was Breaking Free. That was in the year 2000. Each and every study has impacted my life in a significant way. I have learned, really learned, that Jesus loves me. I have learned how to dig into the Word for myself. I have learned how to Live Beyond myself. I have developed an even deeper appreciation for Biblical history, and the Jewish heritage we all, as Christians, share. Every year I was challenged and every year I grew to love Jesus more and more.

It has been an awesome 10 years, Happy 10th Anniversary Beth!

After getting hooked that first year, I continued for another six years or so. Then I decided to open up my home and lead others, who otherwise might not get the opportunity, through her studies. I was thrilled and privileged to be able to see Beth at Living Proof Live in Fargo just this past summer. I am now co-leading a larger group at another church and loving it more than ever. We are doing Esther.

The study couldn't be more pertinent to me and to my life right now. I am just beginning to push forward into the destiny to which I have been called. This blog is just a small part of answering God's calling on my life. I am so glad that Beth taught me that God qualifies the called.

So, Beth I thank you. I thank God for you and ask Him to continue to bless you so that you can continue to bless me... Oh! I meant ALL us ladies who look forward to each new study you complete!

My prayer that first year during Breaking Free was that I would know and love Jesus the way Beth knows Him and loves Him. I prayed that I would someday teach others about Him as she does. Today the highest compliment I can get, other than that someone sees Christ in me, is that I remind them of Beth when I am teaching.

Which brings me to something else Beth taught me. When she was just beginning she wanted so much to emulate another great teacher (I am only guessing, but I think she was referring to Kay Arthur!). But the Lord told her, "I don't need another teacher just like her, what I need is you, Beth!"

And the Lord told me something similar: "I already have a Beth Moore, now what I need is you, Darilyn!"

So, my ministry is called Tried and True Ministries. I have tried Jesus and found Him to be True. I love Him with all my heart and soul and mind and strength and I pray that I may inspire others to discover His love as Beth has inspired me.

Readers: Have you ever taken a Beth Moore study? If so, tell me how it influenced you.

Jesus Will Clothe You, Pretty Woman!

One fall I was at my favorite second-hand clothing store because I needed to find a winter coat. I had looked through the entire store, but found nothing. Just before I was about to leave empty-handed, a lady arrived with clothing to consign. I lingered in the hopes that somewhere among her items would be a winter coat for me.

She brought in bundle after bundle as I continued to ‘shop’. Each large bundle was wrapped in a black garbage bag turned upside down, with the hangers sticking out a whole in the bottom. As she brought in the bundles, the shop owner hung them on rolling racks. Soon four racks were bulging full, and the lady was gone. I could barely contain my curiosity.

As we opened each bundle (I was in there helping by now) we found coats of every shape, style, color, and for every season. And yes, they were just my size! I tried on many of the coats as I talked with the owner of the shop.

She told me that the suede coat that I liked best was probably worth $800 retail, an amount I never would have been able to spend on myself! Not only was this coat beautiful, but it was so warm and comfortable. Then I noticed it was brand new. Not like new, it was new. The original tags had never been taken off. The owner of the shop was saying she’d probably price it at around $250. No doubt the coat was well worth that amount, but since I couldn’t spend even that much, I said nothing. I smiled and continued talking with the shop owner. Spontaneously, she offered to sell the coat to me for $40.

Friend, that is Jesus! I was so happy and thankful and told everyone I knew about my little clothing miracle. I might not have had a Gold Card, or a billlionaire 'boyfriend' but I sure enough felt like a million dollars!

A few years after that incident, I met the wonderful man I am married to today. We had planned a late November wedding. Where I live, winters can be extreme. But I wasn't worried about what kind of coat I would wear on my wedding day -- with so many other things on my mind, I really hadn't given it any thought.

Thankfully, my sister-in-law-to-be has an amazing mind for details. Along with helping us by taking care of decorating the church (and SO much more) she arranged for me to borrow a full-length off-white fur coat. It belonged to an aunt in the family, and it had been in storage at my sister-in-law's house. I was overjoyed just to have something to wear, and I have to admit, it looked pretty spectacular!

During the dinner reception, the aunt whose coat it was asked me if I was enjoying wearing it. "Oh, yes!" I exclaimed, "It is the most beautiful coat I have ever seen!"

"Oh good," she said, "because I was just thinking that it looks like it was made for you and that you should keep it as my wedding gift, just for you."

So that is how Jesus wrapped me in a beautiful, full-length fur coat! I felt like a Pretty Woman, one clothed in honor.

But even when we don’t see Him at work in the practical, we can rest assured He is always operating in the spiritual. There we are guaranteed to be adorned with “garments of praise” and “robes of righteousness.” He won’t just give us a new outer image; He makes us new from the inside out!

Readers: Has Jesus done something like this for you? Tell me about it.

Extreme Makeover -- Clothed in Honor

Once Vivian accepted Edward’s offer, he began to provide clothing for her. If she is going to be seen with him, she needs to make the right impression. If she is going to be at his side, she needs to look elegant. First he sends her out to buy some clothes on her own, after instructing her on what to wear, and What Not to Wear.

On her own, she is unable to get the help she needs in the upscale shops she visits. The salespeople look down their noses at her and send her on her way. It is at this point that Edward steps in and ensures that every one of them is practically bowing and scraping to fulfill her every whim.

Ah, yes, the power of a gold card. (sigh!) No doubt about it! These are among our favorite scenes in Pretty Woman!

Jesus also cares about what we wear. If we are to represent Him, we also need to be aware of the impression we are making. I’ve noticed women of all ages and all walks of life dress in a way that leaves little to the imagination. This is not what Jesus wants for us.

Remember how Vivian looked so classy, respectable, and distinguished after she changed the way she dressed? She is absolutely dignified in a polka-dot dress with matching hat, gloves, pumps, belt and purse, with a smile of confidence on her face, and her head held high. And now, rather than garnering all the wrong kind of attention, she is turning heads for all the right reasons.

That is what Christ wants for you. It’s not about you being the center of attention; it’s about Him being glorified because you are His. Appropriate clothing brings Him honor, He cares a great deal about how you are dressed.

“I clothed you with an embroidered dress and put leather sandals on you. I dressed you in fine linen and covered you with costly garments. ...your clothes were of fine linen and costly fabric and embroidered cloth. ...You became very beautiful and rose to be a queen. And your fame spread among the nations on account of your beauty, because the splendor I had given you made your beauty perfect, declares the Sovereign LORD.” Ezekiel 16:10-14

Jesus will not physically take you shopping -- but He can tell you What Not to Wear. He wants you clothed with dignity and honor. He doesn't want you to buy into the lies of this world that you must be provocative to be noticed, to be valued, to be important. Girls -- you don't want the wrong kind of attention, do you?

Precious Reader: Begin today to view yourself as the Pretty Woman you really are. I am not saying to go out and spend a bunch of money you don't have -- we have to be smart about money, especially these days! But, next time you get dressed to go somewhere, ask yourself, "Does this bring honor to Jesus? To me?"

Wanted: Romantic Entanglements of the Eternal Variety

Edward states his reason in striking the ‘business deal’ with Vivian as wanting a professional to be at his beck and call.

She quips, "You want me to be your 'Beck and Callgirl?"

Edward is quite emphatic about NOT wanting any romantic entanglements. (Ladies, at least he is up front about it!)

In this regard, Jesus’ motives are nothing like Edward’s. From the beginning, Jesus was motivated by love to purchase us. The purest form of love you could ever imagine was and is his motivation towards you. Scripture is very clear about this.

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

Jesus wants a romantic entanglement with you. He wants to be one with you, even as He is One with God the Father. Check out Jesus' prayer for you:

"I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them." John 17:20-26

Isn't that the perfect picture of unity, of intimacy? Isn't that what every one of us craves -- a man who is emotionally available?

I'll tell you, Jesus is IT!

He wants to be one with you! He wants you to fully rely on Him, now and forever. He does NOT have a fear of commitment. He is not emotionally unavailable. He is not looking for a "professional."

In fact, Jesus is attracted to your weaknesses. Your neediness. He is the One and Only man who is Man enough to lavish you with His full attention, and be totally there for you no matter how clingy or how pouty you are.

How about you, sisters, doesn't that sound great?

The Power to Purchase

• 
  Something we really love about Edward is his power. Let’s face it. In this world, a man with money is a man with power. We all dream that some day our prince will come. In that dream, our prince is both rich and powerful!
  
  Edward can afford to do whatever he wants: He rents the Penthouse because it is the best, even though he is afraid of heights. He buys and sells companies whether the current owner is cooperative or not. He even manages to buy respect for Vivian. By using his purchasing power, he has the hotel staff, the retailers on Rodeo Drive, and even his colleagues treating Vivian with complete deference.
  
  Edward is a man used to getting whatever he wants. Edward offers to pay Vivian – first for giving him directions back to his hotel. Then he decides to "purchase" her for the night. Perhaps he is moved by pity for her after she helped him find his way to his hotel. Later he makes her an offer to keep her for the remainder of the week. Perhaps he is intrigued by her. He says it is because he doesn’t want to be alone. (Although we can guess there were other motives.) They haggle over price, and finally agree on $3000.
  
  While Edwards is very wealthy by earthly standards, Jesus is exponentially wealthier than all the richest men on the face of the earth (fictional or otherwise), put together.
  
  “for every animal of the forest is mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills. I know every bird in the mountains, and the creatures of the field are mine. . . . for the world is mine, and all that is in it.” Psalm 50:10-12
  
  Another verse confirms that everything and everyone belongs to Him:
  
  “The earth is the LORD's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it;” Psalm 24:1
  
  And Jesus is powerful. So indescribably powerful he can calm a raging storm with a single word.
  
  “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him.” Matthew 8:27
  
  Jesus has all the resources and all the power to do anything he would ever want to do. And, like Edward, Jesus makes an offer to purchase. In fact, Jesus has already paid the price to keep you at His side, not just for a day or a week, but for all eternity.
  
  “You are not your own; you were bought at a price.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
  
  What price did he pay?
  
  Jesus paid for your eternal life with His own life . . .
  
  “…his own blood.” Acts 20:28
  
  Readers: Does it seem real to you that Jesus surrendered His life for yours, and considered the transaction well worth it? Explain...
  
  

Total Acceptance -- Proof Part 2

I am sure it was pretty strange for Vivian as she began to realize that she was accepted by Edward. I mean, she didn't exactly run in the same circles as the likes of him! And yet, it was true!

Just as it was true that Vivian was accepted by Edward, it is true that Jesus accepts us. A passage that confirms we are loved and accepted unconditionally is Psalm 139:1-4:

“O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.”

God lavished us with his grace with all wisdom and understanding, as we saw in the last blog post.

Today we see that He knows our every thought, our every deed, indeed the very motives of our hearts. We are an open book to Him, transparent before him. There is nothing hidden from him about us.

Jesus knows you. He sees right through whomever you are pretending to be, to who you really are.

He is not put off by any of your shortcomings; your faults, your failures, or your flaws. He wants you to relax and be yourself – that is who he created you to be! He wants you to be comfortable in his presence. No matter what is in your past, or what your situation is right now, Jesus accepts you.

How can a perfect and holy Deity accept an imperfect sinner? He sees the repentant sinner through the “rose-colored glasses” of grace. He chooses to view us as pure and holy which is how we are, after being washed in the blood of the Lamb.

Isn’t that one of the things we love best about Edward? He saw Vivian not as who she had been, but as who she would be and could be under his care and guidance. He accepted her.

Dearest Reader: Do you find it hard to believe that Jesus accepts you completely, just the way you are?

Total Acceptance -- Proof Part I

Edward certainly would have had several good reasons to reject Vivian. She was socially beneath him, uneducated, and morally deficient. Yet, he accepted her just as she was. Jesus does the same for you.

Let’s look, in John chapter 4, at the way Jesus responded to the Samaritan woman he met by the well. He would have had three good reasons to ignore or rebuff this woman:

• First, she was a woman.
• Second, she was a Samaritan.
• Third, and most importantly, this woman had had multiple husbands, so she would have been considered far beneath Jesus on a moral level.

Jesus had already been criticized for spending time with tax collectors and sinners, and here he was again talking to a sinful woman. It was not that He didn’t know her shameful past. He knew it fully and wanted to befriend her anyway.

“The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband.” John 4:18

Jesus did not care that she was from a culture that was considered beneath him. Jesus did not care that she was a female, considered less important than a man, and most poignantly, Jesus did not let her sinful history stand in the way of the total and unconditional acceptance he offered her. Every woman deeply desires the security of knowing that her man can handle knowing the worst about her, and will love her anyway.

That is exactly what we have in Jesus.

We can be sure because this was not an isolated incident. Jesus responded in a similar way to another woman caught in the very act of adultery. She was dragged by an angry group of Pharisees to the temple courts where Jesus was teaching. They made her stand before everyone and announced that the Law called for her to be stoned to death for committing adultery. (Talk about public humiliation!)

Jesus did not condemn her as they expected Him to. He simply said to the men who were about to stone her:

“If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” John 8:7

On yet another occasion in Luke chapter 7 Jesus praised the woman who washed his feet with her tears and her hair. While the self-righteous religious leaders looked down their noses at her, “a sinful woman”, and criticized Jesus for allowing her to even touch Him, Jesus praised and exalted her.

“Her many sins have been forgiven--for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.” Luke 7:47

Do you want someone who knows everything about you, your imperfections, and your past, but who accepts you unconditionally anyway?

I know I do.

That Person for me is Christ Jesus.

You see, no matter how vast our sin is, no matter how much baggage we bring to Him, his grace will always exceed it.

“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.” Ephesians 1:7-8

That verse is so precious to me because it proves He knows everything about me, and accepts me just the way I am, warts and all! He accepts you just the way you are too. In fact, he lavishes his grace on us.

Lavish is an extravagant word that means generous, abundant and plentiful – in other words – more than enough grace to cover all our past, all our baggage, all our secret shame and sin. His grace is more than enough to cover our inadequacies.

Precious Reader: When you read, "No matter how much baggage we bring to Him, His grace will always exceed it." Do you feel relieved? grateful? sceptical? something else?

Total Acceptance, ...Past and All

In spite of their obvious differences, perhaps even because of them, Edward wants Vivian to stay. He accepts her, just as she is.

Jesus accepts you too. Just as you are. For starters, He already knows your name.
“He calls his own sheep by name” John 10:3

I remember a time early in my Christian walk when I visualized what I thought Jesus saw from his position high on the cross. I imagined that he saw a crowd of people stretched endlessly all around him – all those who would trust in Him for their salvation. I knew I was in that crowd, but imagined myself to be in the far distance. I thought He only saw me as a dot in that endless sea of faces. I figured He would recognize me, after all He is God. But when I began to realize that He knew me intimately, it changed my whole life.

When I realized that He not only knows my name, but has it engraved in the palm of his hand, I was so overwhelmed with the personal nature of his interest in me.
“See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;” Isaiah 49:16

He is intensely interested in you too. He knows your name. In fact, He’s known your name since before the foundations of the earth were laid. Isn’t that amazing?

And Jesus sees you, for better or for worse, through and through. From every detail of your outer appearance to the innermost secrets of your heart, Jesus already knows it all. Even if you wanted to hide something from Him, you can’t. Not even something as insignificant as dental floss.

He saw you when you were being formed in the womb. There is nothing that he doesn’t know about you, including the number of hairs on your head – and what your natural hair color really is! He knows what you look like without your hair done, without make-up, and without plastic surgery (if you’ve had it).

“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep.” John 10:14.

Jesus knows everything you’ve ever done, or even thought about doing. Jesus’ acceptance of you is unconditional in a way that no other person’s ever could be. There is nothing about you, either tangible qualities or intangible qualities, Jesus does not accept. Nothing in your past, your present, or even your future can keep him from accepting you. He knows your deepest fear, and your highest hope. It doesn’t matter if you feel like you are the worst person to ever live. Jesus’ attitude of acceptance towards us goes so much deeper than the stain of any sin.

Need proof?

I did too. I will share abundant proof in the next post, so check back!!

Readers: How does it make you feel to know that Jesus knows every little thing about you? (Personally, I found it both awesome and terrifying.)

History Reveals the Mystery of a Destroyed Friendship

But, unfortunately, our friendship did not remain in tact. All of a sudden, he would not talk to me, would not spend time with me. And his little sister who was the third party of our previously inseparable trio, would not speak to me either, much less explain to me what I had done. I was devastated beyond words. I had no idea what the problem was, and I was powerless to discover it or mend the rift.

After observing me alone and despondent, my fifth grade teacher (God bless teachers!) sat me down and asked me what happened. I told her I didn't know. She asked what happened the last time we were together. I thought back to the day that I had learned Ian was Jewish.

After telling me his nationality, he had asked about mine. Let me tell you my family was equal parts of two European countries, and we really did not identify with either one. Had I known anything about history, WWII or the Holocaust, I certainly would have answered differently. I would have gladly forfeited any part (indeed every part) of my heritage to remain friends. In my ignorance, I answered with the first thing that popped into my mind.

When I got to that part of the story, my fifth grade teacher let out an "Ooooh!" which really meant, "Ah-ha." I pressed her for an explanation, and got a very perfunctory one. In any case, I got the message that Ian was justified in no longer wanting to be my friend, since I was German.

Soon after that we moved away, and I only ever saw Ian and his little sister one other time. It was when Star Wars came out and I saw them in line outside the theater. They still would not talk to me.

In the years following, I researched what happened. I wanted to know exactly what happened that had the power to ruin the friendship of two children, 30 years later, and half a world away. I grew up with such a feeling of sorrow and regret for all that happened. I grew up evading the question regarding my nationality, until I was sure it was 'safe' to do so.

I guess this is why when I read Anne Frank, see movies like Defiance or hear survivor stories, I am deeply moved. I am so sorry for what happened, and I thank God that my grandfathers both fought against the evil in Europe. So, I count myself extremely privileged to have had the opportunity to do one small thing to help preserve the truth of what happened.

Readers: With people out there who are intent in denying the holocaust, we all must stand up and defend the truth. To do your part, please visit http://www.jhcwc.org/ and sign the petition for the Holocaust exhibit to be a permanent one in Winnipeg's new Human Rights Museum.

Opportunity of a Lifetime

I had the privilege recently of proofreading another author's book. This was no ordinary book, indeed it was extraordinary. I felt specially selected by Providence to be so honored as to be asked to participate (in some small way) in its completion.

The volume was a collection of first-hand accounts of Holocaust Survivors. Each would rival Schindler's List, so intense and detailed were they in the telling. The collection was compiled by Belle Millo. All of the survivors eventually settled in Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada and made a new life there.

How did I happen upon such an amazing opportunity?

Two or three years ago I attended a Holocaust Symposium and I met a lovely woman who was the keynote speaker, and a survivor herself. Afterwards, I went up to meet her and encouraged her to write her story as a book -- so incredible was her account. I was sure it would be a best-seller. She took down my contact information but did not get in touch with me at that time.

She sought me out several weeks ago. She remembered me from more than two years before! She said my earnest and genuine interest was memorable because so few people react that way.

I was surprised to hear that my authentic concern and caring was rare. I mean, who could remain unmoved upon hearing about the persecution the Jewish endured? I asked myself, what in my life's experience could have caused me to have such a heart for the plight of the Jewish people?

And then I remembered.

The summer between fourth and fifth grade my family moved into a house that was just being built. I made friends with a boy that summer, his name was Ian. We were inseparable. We spent every minute together, unless we went to our respective homes for food or sleep. We rode bikes, built bike jump ramps higher and higher, climbed trees, created adventures, and played in the half-built houses all over the neighbourhood. I was such a tom-boy at that time, I doubt he even knew I was a girl. That summer holds some of my happiest memories of childhood.

Fall arrived and with it, school and cooler weather. One day Ian invited me to his home. I had never been inside his house before, had never met his family. He had a beautiful home, and I could feel the closeness of his family. I noticed some kind of wall hanging and commented on it. He told me that their family was Jewish. I had never heard of "Jewish" before. He explained that it was a nationality and a faith all in one.

I was so impressed! How cool is that to have a whole nation of people who believed the same way! What unity! What a sense of identity and purpose! Of course, I was too young and too inarticulate to express to him the fullness of my sense of awe. If our friendship had remained in tact, I have no doubt I would have converted, so needy was I for a sense of belonging.

But our friendship did not remain in tact.

Readers: If there was anything from your childhood you could fix, what would it be?