Once Upon a Time in Florida ...

In my third year of being a single mom, I had promised myself that if I got a solid teaching job, I would take the kids to Disney World.  So after my first year of teaching full time, I booked the three of us a two week vacation to Orlando.

We were staying at a budget place near Disney World, that cost a mere $25 per night, and offered a full breakfast buffet daily where kids ate for free!  Needless to say, we were there faithfully every morning.  One morning as we were waiting in line to be seated, there was an elderly couple just ahead of us.  The woman was in a wheelchair and her husband was pushing her.  At first glance, I thought, "Oh my, isn't that wonderful, she is unable to walk, but she has a husband to take care of her." Then, "Lucky her, poor me, I wish I had a husband ... blah, blah, blah."

Momentarily, the couple was led to a table close enough to the podium that I could both hear and see what transpired while we continued to wait for our table.  The restaurant must have been busier than usual, or perhaps short-handed that day.  In any case, the hostess forgot to give them the cutlery wrapped in a serviette, and rushed off to take care of some other duties.

Meanwhile the husband parked his wife at the table, a little abruptly, and stalked off to the buffet without a second glance at her.  He returned almost immediately with a plate holding a couple of carelessly chosen morsels of food and literally dropped the plate in front of her so forcefully that a clump of scrambled eggs bounced off the plate and landed on the table.  I was riveted to the floor with my jaw slackened in surprise.  Heads turned at the clatter of dish-against-table.  Patrons drew a collective breath to see what would happen next.

The lady simply looked up at her husband and in a gentle, sweet voice said, "Thank you, could you please bring me some cutlery?" I was standing right beside the bin containing the wrapped utensils, and the man was no more than 5 or 6 feet in front of me.

The man retorted, "You don't need any cutlery, eat it with your hands." Then he turned on his heel and returned to the buffet table.

I was so stunned, I couldn't move. It was like time stood still as I realized a few things.  First of all, I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than be treated so cruelly, so humiliatingly, so rudely by the one person who is supposed to cherish me above all others.  Secondly, I saw myself in my old age, all alone and helpless, and wondered if I didn't have a husband, who would care for me?  Thirdly, I realized that in order to not be completely abandoned in my elder years, I would have to become the kind of woman who drew people to her like bees to a flower.  I would need to be surrounded by a group of folks that genuinely loved me and cared for me because I was a blessing in their lives.

And I knew that the only way to become so sweet, so gentle, so loving, that others are drawn to me in that way, I would need to be conformed to the image of Christ.  I would have to be transformed by the renewing of my mind, and I would have to get rid of all traces of bitterness that had taken root in my heart.  I would need God to create a renewed spirit within me.  I would need to think upon whatever is pure, noble, righteous, and good -- in other words, "I" must decrease and He must increase within me.

Immediately, instead of whining about not having a husband, I began worshipping the One who was my Husband.  Right there at the front of the line in that restaurant, I made a commitment to the Lord and to myself that it would be more about Him, and less about me.  Because Jesus promised,

"Whoever loses their life for my sake will find it."

I was prepared to take Him up on that offer.  

Suddenly the hostess was in front of me smiling, "Right this way." She said, "Sorry about the wait." 

"No problem," I returned her smile, and as we followed her to our table, we went right past the couple I had been observing.  They ate together in stoney silence.  The clicking of their cutlery against their plates was the only conversation.

I prayed, "Father, please surround that woman with people that love her and cherish her.  Please protect her heart.  Let her know You, Lord, so that she may know what true love looks like and feels like.  Oh Father, no one should be treated like that!  Please tender her husband's heart towards her and let him be repentant for how he has been acting towards her.  And let him come to full knowledge of You.  Lord I pray that you will make me into the woman you created me to be.  Let me not be bitter, selfish, or even remotely sorry for myself.  Let me rejoice in each and every day that you make for me, that I may serve you better, know you more completely and love you more deeply.  And Father, I pray that you will never let me be treated as this poor woman is being treated now."

Readers, I pray none of you are being treated like this woman was being treated.  But more importantly, I pray that you will seek Him with all your heart and soul and mind and strength so that you will become the most irresistible flower attracting many bees to care for you, love you, honour you and bless you all the days of your life. I pray the same for me.  God Bless you!

Love, Darilyn

Free E-Book!

I have to share:


I thought this looked good, and then I saw it is free for on your kindle.  So why not give it a click?

I have no idea what this book is about, no idea about the author, or if it is any good.  I just saw that it was FREE, and thought I would share.

Love, Darilyn

P.S. Let me know what you think of it.

Just Because ...

Have you ever invited someone you really don't respect or admire for dinner just because they were related to you?  Perhaps you felt obligated to invite someone for dinner just because they had previously invited you?  Do you laugh at your boss's jokes just because he is your boss?  Have you maintained a relationship with someone just because it is convenient?  Or just because it is expected?

I know I have.  I never feel good about it, but sometimes I have felt like I have to connect with someone; not because I want to, but because it is required of me.  A typical example of this might be attending a bridal shower for my neighbour's sister's son's fiance, even though I've never met her.  More likely it would be attending a Christmas party because it is being thrown by a colleague, and everyone is expected to be there.  The feeling is about as warm and fuzzy as an ex-convict feels about connecting with his parole officer.

We've probably all been in situations where we have had to "keep our chin up" and do what has to be done because it has to be done.  I'm not saying it is wrong to do the right thing because it is the right thing to do.  I am just feeling regret that our feelings are often less than genuine.

In an ideal world, we would experience genuine delight every time we run into our neighbour (who has all day to talk, and talk, and talk when we need to get to work).  We would be excited to see Aunt Olga at Christmas time (the one with a moustache who complains loudly about her raging hemorrhoids throughout the holiday feast).  But it isn't an ideal world.

I know, as a teacher, that there is a percentage of kids who just tune me out.  They have to be there, and that's fine.  I teach the best material I can find, and do my best to make it even better.  I deliver the material in the best way I know how.  I hope and pray that they enjoy my classes.  But inevitably, some tolerate my classes just because they need that credit.  This I can handle.

But lately, I feel that someone close to me is just tolerating my presence.  It really hurts to feel that I am not appreciated or valued.  I am certainly not the kind of person who would 'require' someone to be with me out of obligation.  When I inquired of this person on this issue, I was not given any kind of assurance.  It left me feeling really upset.  I want to be wanted.  I wondered, "Aren't I worth it?"

So, as is my custom, I talked it over with the Lord.  And I realized that the way I feel in this relationship is the way the Lord feels about me.  He wants me to want Him.  He wants me to appreciate Him and value Him.  He wants me to delight myself in Him.  He wants me to want to be with Him.  The last thing He wants is for me to "do devotions" out of obligation, or because I feel it is required of me.  The difference is that He wants me to want Him, NOT because He is insecure and needy (like me), but because He knows I need to need Him.

I bet there are a lot of "Christians" who go to church just because it is Sunday, and not because they want to.  I think far too many Christians do the right thing just because we are supposed to, rather than out of love for the Lord.  I know that used to be me.  I did devotions as a way of "paying my dues."  How sad.  I can see clearly now how unsatisfying that would have been for Him.  And it was certainly a futile exercise for me.  But that was before I discovered how much Jesus loves me.  His love changed everything.

Now I want to be with Him, just because He is my source of joy.  Just because He totally understands me, edifies me, values me, treasures me, and wants me.  I want to know Him more and more!  He is so much more than "all that" and a bag of chips!  He is my everything and I am desperate for Him.  Just because He is Who He is.

He thinks I am worth it.  He was willing to walk that Calvary Road, be whipped and scorned and hung on a cross to die, just because He thought I was worth it.  And if thinks I am worth it, then I have to agree with Him.  After all, He is God!  And if He thinks I am worth it, and if He wants me and delights in me, and if He loves me ... really, what else matters?

Readers, do you love Him?  Do you know Him?  Do you want Him, just because He is?  I pray you do, I pray you will.

Love, Darilyn