Appreciation Part II

Jesus is with you always. He sees all that you do for your husband, your family, your friends, your boss, and your clients.

He opened the curtain of heaven for just a brief time, just long enough to dictate seven love letters to you, His bride. The beloved disciple, John, was in exile on the island of Patmos when Jesus revealed these words to you, his beloved bride, his church:

“I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance.

You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name,

and have not grown weary.”

Revelations 2:2-3

Ladies, every dirty diaper, every middle-of-the-night feeding, every sink full of dirty dishes, every grubby bathroom, every accident left by the dog, every late-night-pick-up of teenagers, every long-haul trek to a basketball game, baseball game, or football game where you cheered for your benchwarmer's team until your throat was hoarse, Jesus knows about it.

“You hate the practices . . . which I also hate.”

Rev. 2:6

Mothers, every time you took your kid to task over a little white lie, every time you told your pre-teenager to watch their tone of voice with you, and every time you held your teens accountable for their behaviour, Jesus rejoiced over you! He loves that you hate what He hates!

“I know you afflictions and your poverty --”

Rev. 2:9

Every time you went without so your kids wouldn't have to, every time you trimmed the budget and stuck with it, and every time you pretended that you like bologna, Jesus has witnessed it. No small sacrifice escapes His notice.

“I know your deeds, your love and faith,

your service and perseverance,”

Rev 2:19

Any time you have ever volunteered at the nursery at church when the toddlers all had runny noses, or bought Girl Guide cookies even when your hips really didn't need to get any larger, or canvassed for the Heart and Stroke foundation in the pouring rain, Jesus knows. He knows it all.

“I know your deeds. ...

I know you have little strength,

yet you have kept my word and gave not denied my name.

I will make those who . . . are liars – I will make them come and fall down at your feet

and acknowledge that I have loved you.

Since you have kept my command to endure patiently . . .”

Rev 3:8-10

Jesus knows all that you have done. He knows how tired you are, and that you keep on doing what needs to be done anyways. He knows there are those who oppose you, even if you don't know it. He does, and He promises that they will find out in the end that He was on your side all along. Doesn't that make you smile?

Readers, can't you just hear his praises? He sees, He knows, and acknowledges your hard work. He promises to reward you for it. Jesus appreciates you. Isn't that enough? I mean, here we have the King of kings, stopping for a moment while holding all creation together, and telling you that your efforts are noticed. Not only noticed, but duly noted. You will be rewarded.

Don’t lose sight of the fact that Jesus sees it all. Every sacrifice large and small. Hide His words of appreciation in your heart. Memorize them so you can comfort yourself in your hour of need.

Jesus will meet your need for Appreciation -- Part I

It is generally acknowledged that women need to feel appreciated for the things they do. A woman that feels appreciated is motivated to do even more for her family, her co-workers, her boss, or her clients. For most women, and especially single mothers, a word of appreciation is a rare and treasured thing.

Functioning without appreciation is like running a vehicle on an empty gas tank. We can begin to grow weary and let hopelessness sneak in. We start to feel sorry for ourselves, and begin to feel alone (even though we know we are not), because we feel we have to do everything ourselves.

It is at times like these we begin to long for someone to notice the things we do, and to acknowledge our efforts. Our hearts cry out, “Doesn’t anyone see how hard this is for me?” “Doesn’t anyone see how much I do, all on my own?”

Unmarried women think how wonderful it would be to have an appreciative man around to applaud us for the efforts we make. Meanwhile married women think that single women at least don't feel taken for granted!

If we, married or not, expect someone to meet our need to be appreciated, we are in for some trouble. There will be two problems with that. First, people, in all their humanness, don’t see all the many details you take care of tirelessly day after day. Second, even if you did have someone around that actually notices your hard work, sacrifice, and dedication, chances are that person would be unable to articulate enough thanks.

Have you ever heard someone say, "I just can't thank you enough!"? It is true. Our need for appreciation is never truly satiated.

This is especially true if we are expecting multitudes of gratitude from our husbands. I’m not putting men down in any way, it is simply a fact that men are not as verbal as women. So when a man says, “Thanks” he thinks it is the sacrifice of praise!

Meanwhile we're thinking, “That’s it? ‘Thanks’?! I spent hours doing that for you!!” And we feel robbed of the honor we feel we think we deserve.

Hear me when I tell you: there is no person on earth who will ever be able to fully meet your need for appreciation.

However, there is good news. Jesus came so that you would have life, and have it to the full. He never intended to leave you in an impossible situation. He always provides a way out. He is the Way.

Are you ready for it? Read on, and follow me into a journey of truth.

Things did not get better in my life. But my life got better.

I will tell you what I hate. What I really, really hate, is the lie that if you accept Jesus as your saviour, your life will magically transform into butterflies and roses.

After I got serious about pursuing Christ, things did not get better in my life. But my life got better. On the outside, things got even worse, but on the inside, I was growing stronger and more faithful.

It was just the way scripture describes it:

“Though outwardly [I was] wasting away,

yet inwardly [I am] being renewed day by day.”

2 Corinthians 4:16

I was being renewed because I was learning that Jesus really is the One and Only that I need. I came to realize by experience that He either IS what I need, or He provides what I need. There is nothing He can’t provide or fulfill in my life – if I think so, it is only because I have not yet learned how he can, does, or will provide the very thing I need.

I really did learn firsthand that Jesus is all I need. And there were times that He was all I had. This blog will share with you exactly how Jesus will meet your needs, just like He met mine. If only you will let Him.

I came by this knowledge through years of seeking out Truth, and through a myriad of experiences, and I beg you to never reduce my life-lesson into the phrase, “Jesus is enough.” Instead, when have the desire to help another, please share this link. Never let “Jesus is enough” be a catch-phrase – I pray you will let it become a reality in your life.

A Very Different Tale

As I was saying, I thank God that I later attended a church where the pastor told a very different tale than the uptight, holier-than-thou pastor had told.

My new pastor, at a different church in a different town, told us about when he was a small boy. His father, when leaving early in the morning for work one day, opened up their natural gas powered stove and turned it on. Then, while his wife and five children were still sound asleep in the quiet peace of the early dawn, he threw a match in the door as he left.

As you can imagine, that house was immediately engulfed in flames. It was a miracle that any one of them lived.

While this pastor, then just a small boy, lay in a hospital bed on the brink of death, his mother prayed. “Lord, if you spare my son, he is all yours. I will raise him for you and you only all the days of his life.”

The Lord answered that desperate mother’s plea. As a result, our pastor stood before us that day with joy evident on his face as he worshipped unashamed of the tears running down his cheeks.

He said, “If I can endure the physical pain of 2^nd and 3^rd degree burns all over my body, lungs seared from breathing in that heat, and worst of all, the emotional pain of knowing my own father wanted me dead, and I can still stand here and praise the Lord, then, no matter what you’ve been through, you can praise Him too.”

He was right. I looked at him, and thought, “If there was hope for him, there is hope for me.” I felt his pain, and I understood it. What is more, I wanted the joy and love he radiated in spite of it all.

My heartfelt desire is that by sharing with you how Jesus has shown Himself real to me, in spite of it all, you will realize there is hope for you. I so much want to show you how to find in Him everything you need.

If you have ever suffered a deep and painful loss, this blog series is for you. If you have ever faced a challenge so big you thought you would never see the other side, or if you have ever felt like giving up on God because you felt like he’d given up on you, this blog will be a shelter from the storm.

You have not stumbled upon this blog by accident. No more than a drowning person just happens to find a life-preserver nearby in the tempest-tossed waves. It is designed to keep you afloat, to give you a second chance at life and at faith. It is written to bring you fresh hope and a new direction.

It's not about me?

The revelation begins as a sneaking suspicion. The world will not cooperate, at times, and that is when you first begin to wonder. Then the evidence mounts up quickly when things are just not going your way. But when you find out for sure -- even though it should be obvious -- it still comes as a shock. It's not about me?

A special thanks to Rick Warren for confirming that for me in the opening lines of his book, "Purpose Driven Life." If I hadn't seen it in print, I would probably still be fighting it.

It really is all about Jesus. Who He is, what He has done, and most importantly, how He can make all the difference in the nitty-gritty of your life, right now.

But, in order to open up to you exactly how Jesus makes a daily difference, I will need to share some of my experiences with you. I may also share some stories that come from the lives of those close to me in order to show you just how powerful Christ is.

Believe me when I say – He can hand you the victory no matter how things look.

I once attended a church where the pastor was telling us that he came from a long line of pastors. He was so proud of the fact that he was the 5^th generation pastor in his family. He also shared that his wife of 35 years was the only woman he had ever kissed.

"The ONLY woman he has ever kissed!?!" I thought, “Oh, crap! I might as well give up on this Christian thing because if that is the standard I have to meet, I have already failed miserably.”

Thank God (I say that not in a flippant way) I later attended a church where the pastor told a very different tale.

I learned then that I am not disqualified, no matter what. And today I tell you -- neither are you!

Pressing in to find "The Answer"

It has taken me nearly 15 years to formulate a new answer to Diana's question, "Is Jesus enough?"

Between that day and now, I have experienced so much more disaster, adventure, success, pain, joy and disappointment than, I imagine, some people experience in a lifetime.

Through it all I continue to press in towards Jesus, demanding that He be "the answer" that a saviour ought to be. I have doggedly kept after Him.

I think I am like that woman who pursued Jesus believing if she just touched the hem of his robe she would be healed. I see her crawling through the tightly packed mob on her bloodied hands and knees in the gravel, weaving her way through the throng just to grab his tassels. Determined that she would not be denied the healing she so needed, she pressed in towards Jesus.

It was worth it for her, and it was worth it for me.

You have my answer in your hands. And it is an answer that was worth fighting for, it was worth writing down, it is worth having, and it is worth sharing.

No matter what life throws at you, take heart! Jesus is enough.

Diana... I wanted so much to be like her!

Diana herself had been through some significant losses. Her husband had left her to raise two children on her own.

She had put herself through school in order to get back on her feet, and had accumulated so much debt in order to do so, that she doubted she would never see black ink again.

To take the job she was currently at, she had to push her grown children out of the nest, and liquidate all her belongings. She too had moved to a strange city.

And, oh joy, she got to live with us. She then had the pleasure of watching my life dissolve before her very eyes.

But unlike me, she had such a sense of peace about her, all the time. Unlike me, she radiated tranquility in spite of all she had lost, and all she had yet to face. She had nothing, yet gave of herself. She had every reason to be bitter and yet, unlike me, she was the sweetest person I had ever met.

I wanted so much to be like her.

She had Jesus and had Him to the full. She was so loving and encouraging. I realize now that it was because,

“Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.”

Matthew 12:34

In Diana’s heart was an abundance of Jesus. She always knew just what to say, until that day.

Until the day she asked, “Is Jesus enough?”

Whoever loses their life for My sake will find it...

During her stay with us, Diana witnessed our lives systematically falling apart. I had already given up my career, my home in a city I loved, and a close circle of supportive friends to move to a bigger city for reasons that seemed to make sense at the time.

I took on a business venture to fill the void that seemed to govern my life, and failed miserably within months. I gambled on success and lost. I remember sitting out by our gorgeous pool wondering if I tied a deck chair to my leg, would it be enough to keep me under.

Failure was the most horrible thing I had ever felt – and that is saying a lot, considering all I’d been through up to that point in my life. We lost our beautiful two-story brick home with our huge, back-yard swimming pool (perhaps that was a good thing after all), along with all our savings. I was horrified at what I had done.

All I wanted was to bring our family success, and I had brought financial disaster down on all our heads. We moved to a different neighborhood, and tried to pick up the pieces. Diana stayed with us through all of this.

Meanwhile, my marriage was unraveling. “Just a couple nights away will warm things up again,” I told myself. So I planned a really romantic getaway for just the two of us. We left our toddlers at home, and off we went for a surprise ski-weekend getaway. I gave my husband new ski equipment for a gift and planned the whole thing. I was determined to breathe new life into our marriage. But, the only thing colder than the windy summit of that mountain was us.

Soon Diana's meager rent, along with some babysitting money I brought in, was all we had to live on. Probably one of the lowest points in my life was the day we had to bring home food from the food bank at our little church. I felt like my life was over. And in a way, it was.

But it was a beginning. It was how I began to rely on the love God has for me. I was just starting to realize that Jesus is all I need. I was about to embark on a journey -- which continues to this day -- which is revealing to me all the myriad of ways that Jesus is enough.

"Whoever loses his life for my sake will find it..." -- Jesus

Is Jesus Enough?

“Is Jesus enough?” Diana asked.

I looked up at her through my tears with a quizzical and annoyed look on my face. My thoughts raced as I searched my mind for the answer.

Actually I had my answer, I just didn’t know how to say it without hurting her feelings: "Of course Jesus isn’t enough! What a stupid question!"

How can Jesus alone be enough? He said Himself that man cannot live on bread alone. Besides all that, we live in a cold climate, we need proper housing, and furniture, and a refrigerator full of food. We need happy marriages, healthy kids and money in the bank – we need our piece of the 'American Dream.'

We need happiness.

Furthermore, I thought I deserved all of this (and more). After all, I thought I had done everything right. I worked two or more jobs at a time in order to put myself through university, rather than relying on student loans and worked very hard to excel at my career. Unlike many of my friends, I had stayed away from drugs and alcohol, and managed to ‘marry smart:’ choosing with my head and not just my heart. I believed I deserved happiness – I just didn’t understand why everything was turning out so, so horribly!

All of that took about a nano-second to blast through my mind, and with tears streaming, and nose running, I croaked out my answer, “No. I know the ‘right’ answer is yes, but it just isn’t. I expected more out of life than this! I need more than what I have right now.” Then I dissolved in another round of sobbing.

By this time, I’m sure Diana was used to seeing me that way. She had been living with us for just over a year. We met her when there was an announcement in our church bulletin that a missionary needed a place to stay for about six weeks. We offered up our empty, but available spare room.

As it turned out, she wasn’t a missionary, and it wasn’t for just six weeks. But we didn’t care, Diana became family to us. Even though I loved and respected her very much -- I really hated the question she had asked.

That question buried itself deep into my heart and I began to ponder its implications. God was about to show me, personally, that Jesus is enough.